Pairing off for one on one prayer is an essential part of helping the House of Prayer Experience meeting become more interactive and community-building. Yet, It may feel weird or scary to be praying out loud, especially with someone one barely knows. What if one is not in the habit of going to church? This might scare off a guest? Actually, the experience can been terror-inducing even for the most seasoned church-attending veteran.
Larry is a church member and strong big guy, but he sheepishly confessed that he felt like hiding when placed in a position of coming up with a coherent and holy sounding prayer out loud on behalf of someone he didn’t know very well.
When the leader calls for breaking up into smaller groups of two or three people with “Okay, find someone to pray with…”, it can be a nerve-wracking moment for some.
The first thing in some people’s mind is: “Who am I going to pray with?” and the next one might be: “What will I say…?!”
Here are five steps for helping new or shy individuals feel more at ease when the facilitator invites people to pray in groups of two.
1. Acknowledge the weirdness
Affirm everyone and break the ice by recognizing that it doesn’t feel natural for everyone to speak to God within earshot of someone else. Encourage people to introduce themselves and to listen to one another before they pray for one another. Help them realize that the anxiety might not go away entirely for some,but that it’s part of their being stretched and used to bless someone else.
2. Be clear with your instructions
Be clear on the expectation and focus of the prayer : will it be a prayer of thanksgiving for one another’s presence at the prayer meeting? Or for intercession by naming to one another the people they have in their hearts?
They may not know what to do next if they are done with their prayers before everyone else. Instruct them beforehand by asking everyone to remain quiet,and to pray in silence for those who are still in their smaller groups.
3. Model simplicity
Give an example of a simple prayer. Tell them that: “Thank you, God for such and such and bless him or her during this hour of prayer” said from the heart counts is a valid prayer. Release them from the pressure of having to come up with the right words and length for their prayer. Be an example: when you pray,don’t add more words than is necessary ,be brief and be simple.
4. Give everyone a pre-written prayer
Use a PrayerScript: Display one on powerpoint or distribute prayers that are written with blanks where one could insert another person’s name. Pre-written prayers alleviates the fear of not knowing what to say.
Use Scripture: Model the prayer by reading a Psalm or a Prayer in Scripture where one may insert a person’s name to claim Bible promises. I especially like using II Thessalonians 1:11-12 as a prayer of blessing at the beginning of our prayer meeting.
5. Remind them of their Mission
God’s House of Prayer is for all people. Everyone has the potential of making a positive contribution into someone else’s life. One of the objectives of the prayer meeting is to adopt a lifestyle that prays and to become empowered agents of hope for Christ.
Ruth had been attending the prayer meeting for about a year. When her good friend became sick and she couldn’t find a clergy to pray for her, Ruth became worried and went on a search for one. A sudden realization stopped her in her tracks:
“My prayers are enough”
Ruth prayed for her friend. She said that before attending prayer meeting, she would be nervous about praying for someone and didn’t trust her prayers. She knows now that she is empowered to minister to others. The prayer meeting became a training ground for her as a prayer ministry leader.
What other ideas would you like to share for helping to make your meeting’s break-out prayer sessions less intimidating?
